Top Ten Ethnic Dishes

Ok, this will be hard. Lets see how it goes.

10. Seaweed Salad - A Japanese concoction that sounds like something you'd eat on fear factor. Or, if you were a homeless person on the beach. But trust me, it's GOOD. Assorted seaweeds tossed with a little red chili, sesame oil and sesame seeds. Served room temp, like it's right from the whale's bowels.

9. Crab Rangoons - A fried chinese appetizer of a cream cheese scallion crab dip, encapsulated in a deep fried wonton. Waiter? An extra napkin for my drool, please.

8. Spinach Pie - Phyllo dough, sandwiching a solid spinach filling. Sounds stupid I guess. But the Greeks do something special to it to make it the perfect texture, and the perfect taste.

7. Guacamole - A Mexican dip of avocado, lime juice, chopped tomatoes, onions and garlic. I make the world's best homemade guac. Oh man. I want some right now.

6. Tako Su - The simplest of dishes on my list. It is a Japanese appetizer. It is sliced octopus, sitting in ponzu sauce, served with daikon and cucumber. If I could eat it every day, I would!

5. Yellow Curry - I love this spicy, creamy, beautifully colored Thai dish. I choose to get mine with duck as the protein. And when done well, you seriously can't resist it. It's got the meat of your choice, assorted veggies, and pineapple, all in an indescribably flavorful yellow curry sauce.

4. Calzone - I'm not sure how authentically Italian calzones really are, but I'll give them credit anyway. I freakin LOVE calzones. Even now, as a low-carb enthusiast, I really just enjoy the innards of a righteously stuffed calzone. I especially love the freedom. You can put whatever your heart desires in that hot pockety goodness.

3. ThaYetTheeThot (Green mango salad) - A traditional Burmese salad, of shredded fresh sour mango mixed with shredded cabbage, shallot, dried shrimp, roasted chili flakes, ground peanuts, and cilantro. Sounds like a weird mish-mash or flavors. And I will admit, it's odd in the first taste. But it quickly becomes addictive in it's complexity.

2. Fish Mahkani - Swordfish cooked in a tandoori oven, then plopped into a rich, creamy, tomato cream sauce. It's an Indian dish that is so warm, spicy, and hearty. Mm!

1. Naruto - Seriously. This japanese appetizer is like a platypus. It is so majestic and heavenly that it's nearly impossible to comprehend. Like most maki, it varies from restaurant to restaurant. But the basic concept is the same, crab, assorted fish and veggies, wrapped tightly in the most thinly slice blanket of cucumber, sitting in a wading pool of ponzu sauce.
Not only is it exquisite to the taste buds, it is also so meticulously crafted, that you feel guilty munching on it.

Soda that'll rock your socks!

1.) Moxie—Hells yeah! This stuff is great. Definitely a bit of an acquired taste, but well worth it once you do. On a side note, it's one of the few soda's that has a diet version that tastes very close to the original. I love you gentian root.

2.) Dr. Pepper—If you don't like Dr. Pepper I'm pretty sure it's legal for me to shoot you in the face. With 23 flavors mixed together to make one of the best liquids to hit your tongue, it's not only awesome, it makes you burp like a son-of-a-bitch! Diet Dr. P is okay, but a pale shadow of an imitation of the real Dr. Also, knock off products rarely do it justice. Dr. Thunder, Mr. Pibb, etc. none are bad, but the real Dr. is what I order.

3.) Cream Soda—A&W or IBC. mmmmmmm Don't be fooled by generic cream soda, or even the Polar brand. You get a good cream soda, and it's instant nirvana. I'm not talking that crappy band, I mean that place where everything is right.

4.) Rootbeer—This one is a little tougher, I like Barq's, A&W, Mug, IBC... Once again, NOT GENERIC, they just get something wrong in the mix. I've tried all sorts of micro-brew rootbeers, but usually to no avail. They're almost cinnamony, or clove like, it's really rather odd. Moral of the story is, a good rootbeer, is almost a substitute for a good real beer.

5.) Jolt—I'm a caffeine fiend. Addicted even, I love the stuff, it's the only way I can wake up. Jolt is a great pick-me up. And it comes in all sorts of flavors. I personally like them all. But plain ole Jolt Cola is a bit on the sweet side, but not sickeningly so like Pepsi. BLECH! Man I love Jolt, in all it's incarnations.

Top list of people I can't stand listening to talk... (no particular order)

Dr. Phil - Okay, I'm sure there's a lot of people out there who can't seem to figure out a logic problem as simple as which of these shapes fits into a round hole, a triangle, a square, or something round. But do they really need some arrogant, middle-aged, balding man with the charisma of a tree stump to point this out? Does he really think he's helping these people? It's shows like his that are helping to dumb down American intelligence. Just give it up.

Spike Lee - Angry can be funny, angry can be intelligent, angry can prove a point, just listen to some Lewis Black. But anger aimed at the same topic over and over in such a way that really does nothing but make you sound like a broken record of race wars really doesn't help you case. Yes, racism exists, I get it. Okay, people of other races and cultures don't get a fair shake. Sure, I see that. But when all your complaints, rants, and movies are all race biased, you're not helping. Making all black comments is just as racist as all white. Just a different side of the coin. Same point pretty much goes for all racial comedy, heaven forbid a white guy makes a race joke...

Any generic feminist - I'm calling bullshit. You're not looking for equality, you're looking for superiority. I'm choosing feminism, because it's the first one to pop into my head, but pretty much any genre of gung-ho idealism fits. People looking for a way out of working hard for what they want and point the blame elsewhere, that's what it comes down to in my head. Women don't get a fair share, okay, so work hard and make "us" respect you. Show "us" your ideas and prove they are actually good. Don't right a speech about how historically the female mind has been oppressed, show us you shouldn't be. You can shove all the stats you want down my throat, it's only going to make me NOT want to listen to you even more. Numbers can be skewed to prove any point, ask any politician. I'm not saying I don't agree, some of the smartest people I know are female, and they do deserve a fair share of the pie. Just get off your soap box, and use it to prove your point, not preach about it.

Tel-evangelists/ religious zealots - I guess I just don't like being preached at and having someone else's views forced down my throat. I can think for myself. Unless you can prove your religion is the one true idea of God, or if you can prove with FACTS that God even exists, hand me a pamphlet and let me read it. No need to force your ideas down my throat and tell me I'm a horrible person, for not agreeing with you. Maybe you're an evil person for not listening to others.